I can’t even begin to explain how stressful it can be to
plan a wedding, especially when you are the one writing all the checks and
making all the plans. Short of being a Bridezilla, I have a very specific list
of things I need from the venue where I spend my special day, and those I have
to pay to ensure it all goes smoothly. I don’t feel the need to waste money on
a wedding planner who will spend my money their way, I know how to use Google,
make phone calls, and plan a glorified party.
My biggest stress lies with people who seem to think they know how to
plan my special day for me, and I’m not talking about a wedding planner.
I’ve been victim multiple times to family members telling me
things like “It’s your day and it should be everything you ever wanted!” That
is sweet, and I agree with the statement, but when I share ideas with my family
about ideas I have I get told “You shouldn’t do that for XYZ reason!”
An example was I
initially wanted to have my wedding in the winter because that was when my
fiancé and I got together, and it was important to put those memories into our
special day. After mentioning my expected date I was told, “That’s going to be
COLD!” “What if there is snow!” etc… Just recently I decided to make the date
in May because I couldn’t wait much longer to marry Matt. This brought up new
conflict “What if it isn’t warm enough yet?” I honestly can’t win! I also had a
family member on Matt’s side say, “You
should wait till June… I’ll still be in my program in Spain….” Then proceeded
to tell me that their plans trump my wedding and they wouldn’t come back early
to make it.
Another note that I wanted to include for the wedding was to
have a taco bar for food, it is different and it was the meal Matt and I shared
on the day we started dating and something we both enjoy! Several people,
including my mom (sorry mom), have said, “what if someone doesn’t like tacos?”
My biggest response has been “THEN THEY CAN STARVE!!!” I realize not everyone
is going to like my choice in food, but I can’t tiptoe around every possibility
of dislike.
I understand some people won’t make it to my big day, and
not everyone will like the food I choose. I’ve done my best to accommodate
everyone to the best of my ability, but I can’t make everyone happy…. Frankly I
shouldn’t have to accommodate to anyone except Matt and myself! I just seem to
be struggling with people who say, “it’s your day, and it should be the way you
want it, but don’t do this!” I understand people think they are being helpful,
and are “trying” to give me possible issues that may arise… but as a college
graduate I am well aware of the fact things may not be picture perfect for
everyone involved. Trying to offer ideas and make suggestions is one thing, but
telling me that my idea is flawed really gets under my skin. I already have to
stress about how much this will set me back on top of paying off my school
loans, I don’t need negative feedback for how I want to spend the one day that I
should remember for the rest of my life! This day is to start the rest of my
life with the Man I love, I don’t particularly care if it fits the taste of
those I invite to share in my celebration. 
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