Get off Facebook and Get a J-O-B!

There is a time and place to share personal information on social media. I’m beyond sick and tired of people who put their DIRTY laundry on Facebook for absolutely everyone to see. Frankly, it’s super trashy. No one cares that your baby daddy is a dead beat, that your significant other and you are constantly fighting, or that you are constantly standing up for yourself because people judge your parenting.

First off, if someone is willing to tell you what’s up then you should definitely listen. For whatever reason there is this idea that telling everyone about your personal love life/struggles is supposes to be cute. It’s not. You are opening up for people to judge you.

I can’t stand when people post saying “Someone should bring me this” or “It would be really cool if someone could help me out once in awhile.” You are an ADULT. You have made poor choices that have landed you in this position; there is no one to blame but yourself.

I had really hard times in my life too, but I don’t go around spitting shade on Facebook for everyone and their mother to read. I went to college, got an education, and now I earned a job in my field… I can thank myself for that; meanwhile you can thank yourself for not holding a steady job, having too many kids you can’t feed, and being judged by heaps of people because you give them a first row seat to your diary of bad choices.

Take a break from your full time job of posting status’ on Facebook and get yourself a job that can support your kids and provide a home, food, and clothing. Quit relying on others to help you out. Don’t brag about taking classes for your GED.. You’re an adult, and high school is literally the easiest thing you could have ever done. Now you’re really paying for it in your mid 20s without an education to even gain a job most freshmen in high school are doing.

People constantly need pats on the back for doing normal things like holding a minimum wage job for more than a month, paying their bills on time, and paying for their own gas. If you are seriously struggling so much then don’t waste your time on Facebook and instead take your butt to work.

I realize that there are people who are genuinely down on their luck, but if you are able to post about it/ repost stuff for hours on end each day, then you have time to get a job and at least pay whatever your welfare does not cover.

I’m a child of divorce, and my parents were both always in the picture and my dad was NOT a dead beat. Regardless, my mother worked three jobs at one point to keep me in a good school system and allow us to live in a nice part of town. I never went without and she never received government help. My dad paid child support but that barely made a dent in what she paid for school supplies, food, and rent. I never received free lunches at school, and she always allowed me some luxury items like computer games and new markers to color every once in awhile.  My mom worked a day job in an office and two serving jobs to make sure we were never struggling financially. Yeah I didn’t see her much, but she gave me more than an education and a place to live. She passed down a great work ethic, and standards that I still live by to this day.

 

I don’t have kids; I have two cats. I work two jobs because I like to have nice things. I work a job that my College education prepared me for. I get health insurance and I still work three or so shifts a week as a server so I can have nice things like a Mac book pro, the newest iPhone, and still pay for my wedding and college loans.

College may have put me in debt but it was for a good reason. I will never regret going to get an education. Besides that, I promised my mom after she went blind that I would at least do two years of college. I did one better; I went four years to a university and got my Bachelors in Psychology. I’m proud of that. I’m proud I have good credit, live in Carmel Indiana, and work a job that requires a degree. I don’t have children I cannot afford; I don’t waste my money on drugs or alcohol. I spend my extra money going out with my fiancé and paying for the wedding I want, not just settling for the bare minimum.

I realize there are people out there who get everything handed to them, and that sucks for some of us but that is life. In the meantime if you are not so fortunate to have everything handed to you try working for it. Bill Gates didn’t land in a pool of cash, he worked for it, you can’t sit around and think opportunities will just drop in your lap.

PPPS: If you are offended by this post then that means you should probably get off your butt and find a job outside of reposting meaningless links on Facebook all day…. Take this as your sign to “get it together.“

A letter to my Best Friend!

Dear Best Friend,

We have known each other longer than we have been friends; times between us haven’t always been stories to tell our children one day. Regardless of our petty middle school days we became the best friends in high school. Even though our colleges took us to separate end of the state we still maintained a friendship I wouldn’t change for the world. As our grownup lives have evolved we have made a new path that has moved us further away then we have ever been during our companionship. Even though we are far apart you are still my best friend and no one will change that, not our husbands, our kids, or even our mental state.

Today you called me and broke my heart because I heard you cry but couldn’t wrap my arms around you to make it better. I wasn’t able to be a physical shoulder to cry on, only a helpful voice at the other end of the phone. When you called me and I heard your sobs I wanted to sob as well. Knowing I needed to be a strong friend I did the best I could to hold it together and remind you of all the things you should never forget.

Incase you are hesitant I want to reiterate some of those statements and leave it here on my blog for everyone to see, read, and hopefully learn from.

We all have different paths laid out for us. It’s like going shopping. Sometimes we see cute clothes made for children. As much as we think it is super adorable, we know that it doesn’t fit us. The same concept goes for life goals. One person’s idea of a job, life, and place of living or employment doesn’t always fit for the next person in line.

Don’t let anyone tell you how to live your life, or that what your doing isn’t want they would do for themselves. There is a reason you guys do things differently, you are different people. If we all did the same thing then there would be 7Billion people living in Indiana studying at the same college, and working toward the same profession…. The world doesn’t work well when there aren’t people to grow food, fly planes, and build cars. Our world wouldn’t exist if everyone were living the same life.

No matter what you do, where you live, whom you date I will always be your friend. No decision you make will change how much I love and care about you. I will still be here after every mistake you make even if you just repeat the same one over and over.

Know that you have a purpose, and your purpose is greater than anyone could ever imagine for you. You didn’t end up in your profession by accident; it is where you were meant to be. Your path is taking you to new places and allowing you to grow bigger than anyone else can when they choose to keep their roots in a comfortable area.

If anyone tells you what you’re doing is wrong then look at him or her and say that the only thing wrong in this situation is THEM. My mom always told me “Don’t let someone else make your mood.” If someone is being nasty don’t allow it to bring you down, always remember you can do anything, and if you forget that then you can call me and I’ll tell you!

Don’t ever feel behind because you aren’t getting married, or having kids. There is no expiration date for events like that… don’t push them to happen or you may miss out on something fantastic. We all live life at a different pace, and we can’t compare our chapter 4 to someone else’s’ chapter 10.

If something happens that a pint of Ben and Jerry’s and a bottle of wine can’t fix, call me and I’ll take care of you. If your cat won’t give you the cuddles you need then face time me and I’ll sit him down for a chat about what his purpose is. If a boy breaks your heart I’ll be there to break his bones. I will always be there for you even if you no longer live five minutes down the street.  

Sincerely,

     Your Best Friend

ABA and Penny!

New Job in ABA (Applied Behavioral Analysis) 

So just recently I began a new job and I couldn’t be more excited! I took a position as a Behavioral Therapist in an autism center. I couldn’t be happier. I never expected to find a job so quickly after college, and on top of that I’m working in the field I earned my degree in! (Talk about dreams coming true.)

 

I must say that the job is much harder than I thought it would be, its not easy to work with those who can’t communicate as most of us do. Teaching is hard even if a child does not have a disability. Although it can be difficult it is very worth it. It is beyond rewarding to know I am actually making a difference in lives of not only the child I work with, but also their family.  I also have a very diverse client population.  Some of my kiddos don’t have the ability to vocalize words, others don’t have the ability to identify letters or numbers, and some are just getting potty trained at the age of four and five. It’s eye opening to realize how lucky I was to be able to talk, say my ABC’s, and count to ten when I was their age.

The best part of my job is that I don’t necessarily feel like I’m doing work. I don’t sit behind a desk and use a computer. I work one on one with these young kids on simple ideas such as the difference between a fork and a hair brush, how to sign for something they want, and how to behave in social situations. Although my job can be very technical in the ideas of Applied Behavioral Analysis, it is still fun and the day’s fly by. I also don’t have to dress like a professional…  I get to dress like I did when I went to my college classes! It’s pretty amazing!

New fur baby!

Leonard and Pennt from Big Bang Theory

I talked my Fiancé into adding a new kitten to our family; our little Leo needed a sister. I got my new baby from the Indianapolis Humane Society (where we get all our cats) and she is PURRRRR-fect. 

I had a name picked out before I even knew

Top: Penny
Bottom: Leo

which cat I was getting! We decided to name her Penny! We named our current cat Leo, but we call him Leonard. If anyone is familiar with the show “The Big Bang Theory” you will know the main couples names are Leonard and Penny!!! So that’s how that went down!

She is super cuddly and very sweet. She gives kisses and rubs up against your face at night. I’m very excited that my two babies are getting along and will be able to keep one another company while we are at work during the day.

Unattractive Qualities in a Man

I identify as Heterosexual so I’m doing this based on my ideas of what I think is unattractive about men. Some of, if not all of, these qualities could be used towards women as well. I’m going to list these out, expand on some, and others are pretty self-explanatory!

-       Cheater Here is a note to remember. If you met a guy by him cheating on his girlfriend to be with you… Chances are he will do the same to you!

-       Clingy

-       Controlling Needing to know whom you are with, and what you are doing constantly.

-       Doesn’t have their life together

-       Drinks too much Its one thing to have beer or a drink at dinner, or even several for special occasions, but there is no reason to be getting shit faced every day of the year/ on a Tuesday evening. There are always exceptions for a drink, but a man who needs to be drunk to have fun doesn’t appeal to me.

-       Homophobic I could NEVER be with a guy who didn’t except my best friend… In most cases guys who are homophobic tend to have masculinity issues. Here is a tip to any men who may be reading this, If a gay man thinks you’re attractive then that is a HUGE compliment. That compliment is equivalent to a model finding you attractive. Don’t be mad; OWN IT!!!

-       Immature

-       Jealous this one is something I couldn’t imagine ever dealing with again. Lucky for me I have a man in my life that doesn’t EVER get jealous, and the same goes for how I feel. We just don’t have those qualities. If your ex or your guy friends threaten your man then it sounds like he is insecure about his own abilities as a man.

-       Liar This one is a given, no one likes a liar. I dated a guy who felt the need to lie about EVERYTHING. I began to wonder if he even knew who he was. He just felt the need to look Bad Ass and would say all sorts of dumb things that were beyond UNTRUE. Part of me wants to warn his new girlfriend, but I couldn’t care less about either of them to waste my time.

-       Limited interest in music If you only listen to Rap and Hip Hop there is a good chance you are also just uneducated. I like a good Eminem song, and Hip Hop is fantastic at the club/jamming out to in the car. But if you turn up your nose at some country or alternative then I don’t see you as very attractive.

-       Mean Drunk (Building on drinks too much) I don’t find it remotely okay when men feel the need to assert masculinity and become raging DBags when they drink too much. I’ve seen guys who always feel the need to start fights once they have alcohol flowing through their blood!

-       Parents still pay for EVERYTHING

-       Players

-       Racist

-       Sexist

-       Shady (Not Trustworthy) If they have a passcode on their phone that you are not allowed to access then there is a huge RED flag. My fiancé locks his phone because he doesn’t want anyone to have access to it if it gets stolen or left at work. He has told me the password and even given me my own fingerprint to use it whenever I want. But to be honest I only use it if I need to take a photo or text someone for him. I legit never feel the urge to read through his texts/ Facebook messages/ or anything of that sort. If either of you have to check up on one another in a sneaky way then there is no reason to be together.

-       Shallow

-       Uneducated I’m not saying a guy has to have a college degree, but they better not be a complete idiot. My roommate dated a guy, she now sees the error in her ways, and he was beyond Stupid. She was doing a project on NASA for a speech class in college and he was like “What is N-A-S-A.” He also had a tendency not to know the meaning of simple words and terms. I realize I don’t have a HUGE eloquent vocabulary, but I can hold my own with professionals.